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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, and I’m here to chat about escort – not that fancy car, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the streets! “You shall not pass!” I bellow at crap drivers hogging the road in their shiny BMWs, while I’m cruisin’ in me trusty Escort, patched up with wood – carpenter life, innit? Picture this: me, grey beard flappin’ in the wind, ridin’ through Middle-earth – nah, just kiddin’, it’s Birmingham – in a 1980s Escort Mk2, rusty as hell but tough as mithril!

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s Marco. “We have a situation,” he texts. My heart drops. What now? I rush back to the library, and there’s a group of teenagers causing chaos. They’re laughing, throwing books around. I’m like, “What the heck, guys?” I try to be the cool librarian, but inside, I’m fuming.