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Oi mate, it’s me, James Bond—suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Been thinkin’ bout sex escorts lately, yeah? Fancy gig, innit—sellin’ companionship like it’s a martini. Got me analysin’ it like a bleedin’ Business Analyst, tho I’d rather be sippin’ somethin’ dry than crunchin’ numbers. Picture this: high-class birds struttin’ round, all glam, makin’ blokes weak. Reminds me of *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*—y’know, that Kim Ki-duk flick I bloody love. “What we possess becomes a burden”—ain’t that the truth with escorts? They’re carryin’ charm, sex, secrets—all for a price, mate.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Luca. He’s like, “Yo, you gotta check out the new café on Via XX Settembre.” I’m like, “Dude, I’m busy!” But curiosity gets the best of me. I need a break from the chaos.

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