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Watched *Lost in Translation* last night—again, my fave, yeah? Bob Harris, lonely sod, he’d love this! “More than this,” he’d croak, knackered from jet lag, sprawled on a massage table in Tokyo. Sexual-massage ain’t just a rubdown, nah—it’s intimacy, mate, a connection! Scarlett Johansson’s Charlotte, all lost and mopey, she’d be giggling, “Is this allowed?” while some masseuse works magic. Me? I’d be chuffed—proper happy, like landing a big client!

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Erotic massage with finishing in the mouth from a neighbor, footjob, juicy blowjob. Pampering the clitoris with a gentle toy. Grandma Gerda gets horny while massaging and lets the young .

After that, I head down to Piazza del Mercato. It’s buzzing! Vendors shouting, people haggling. I love it! I grab some fresh pecorino cheese. It’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my cheese right outta my hands! I’m standing there, cheese-less and furious. I mean, come on!

A reportage in the places of Benjamin Piercy: between Macomer and Badde Salighes the BBC arrives