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But ugh, the fakes online? Piss me off! Catfishin’ with blurry pics – “Is that a chick or a foot?” Surprised me once, got a dude in heels – I screeched like Royal yellin’, “Where’s my damn encyclopedia?!” Total chaos, dahling, but I laughed ‘til I cried. Pro tip: check reviews, X posts, don’t get scammed by some poser. I’m thinkin’, *This is not an adventure*, like Chas whinin’ – it’s a transaction, keep it tight!

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Next, I decide to check out the local art scene. There’s this gallery on Via Manzoni. I walk in, and it’s all modern art. Like, what even is that? Some weird splashes of paint. I’m standing there, trying to look cultured, but I’m just confused. I overhear some hipster saying, “It’s a reflection of society.” I’m like, “Nah, it looks like my toddler’s art project.”

Heir to Vinegar Production Family and DJ, Antonio Ponti, to Stand Trial for Drug Possession