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About Naples

But ugh, what ticks me off? The sleazy vibes! Like, c’mon, man, why’s it gotta be so hush-hush? Makes my green skin crawl! Once heard this story—prolly fake, ha!—guy hired an escort to scare his ex. Dressed her as a monk! Freaky, right? Surprised me big time! I was like, “Whoa, that’s next-level petty!”

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After that chaos, I head to the market on Via della Repubblica. Fresh produce, right? I’m all about that. I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s like, “You know, these tomatoes are the best in town!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I just want to pay and go.” But she’s relentless. I’m nodding, pretending to care.

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