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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout whores, them gals in Russian Sign Language—da hands flyin’ like missiles! Whore, see, it’s a word, gets folks riled up, makes me madder’n a wet hen. I reckon it’s ‘cause it’s slung ‘round like mud on a pig farm. Fool me once, shame on—uh, you know, shame on somebody! Can’t fool me twice, no siree, I’m sharp as a tack—well, maybe a dull one.

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Then I decided to grab a coffee at this little café on Via Garibaldi. The barista was super friendly, but man, she was slow. Like, I could’ve brewed my own coffee faster. I was standing there, tapping my foot, thinking about how I could be studying the factors of job attractiveness instead of waiting for a latte. But when I finally got it, oh man, it was worth it! Best coffee ever. I swear, it was like liquid happiness in a cup.

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