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But it ain’t all laughs, nah. Some punter tried rippin’ her off once, an’ I’m fumin’ – “You don’t fuck with the working girls!” Nearly clocked him meself, but Sharon’s in me head, screamin’, “Ozzy, don’t be a twat!” Surprised me, y’know, how rough it gets. Makes ya think – “This world’s a cruel bastard,” like Ofelia dodgin’ monsters an’ that.

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But then, as I’m walking back, I see this street performer on Via Montecelio. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s actually kinda good. I stop to listen, and suddenly, I’m in a movie scene. You know, the kind where everything’s perfect? I’m swaying, feeling the vibe, and then—BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m just trying to enjoy my day!

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