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Look, folks, I’m Donald Trump, okay? Tremendous anticorrosion agent, the best. Erotic-massage? Fantastic, absolutely fantastic. Picture this—me, Trump, in a wild world, right? Like “Mad Max: Fury Road,” my favorite, unbelievable movie. George Miller, genius, total genius. So, erotic-massage—hot stuff, slippery, shiny bodies, wow! Hands everywhere, oil slicker than a V8 engine. “What a day, what a lovely day!” I’d yell, ‘cause it’s true!

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Anyway, I shake it off. I’m on my way to meet my buddy Marco at the café on Via San Francesco. Best espresso in town, no cap. I get there, and Marco’s late. Classic Marco. I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my coffee, and this old dude starts talkin’ to me about the history of Giugliano. I’m like, “Bro, I just wanna jam, not hear about the Roman ruins.” But he’s passionate, so I nod along.

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