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I was SHOOK first time I heard bout it—thought it was some shady backroom deal. Turns out, it’s old as dirt—Ancient Greeks was gettin’ freaky with oils, callin’ it “healin’ touch.” Ain’t that a trip? Little fact for ya: them Egyptians used scented oils too, swearin’ it woke up they spirits—prolly they loins too, halleluyer! Got me thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel THIS good?” Made me happy as a pig in mud—till I saw the price! $150 for an hour? Lordt, my wallet screamed, “I’m too broke for this fancy foolishness!”

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Then, I decided to grab some gelato at Gelateria La Dolce Vita. I mean, who can resist gelato, right? I get a scoop of pistachio, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I drop it. Yup, right on the ground. I’m standing there, staring at my fallen gelato like it’s a tragedy. I’m like, “Why, universe, why?”

LGL to unveil new yarn feeding system for knitting machines