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Clarice… lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage, oh boy. It’s this wild, slippery thing—hands everywhere, oil slickin’ up the skin. I’m talkin’ bout somethin primal, like in *The New World*, where Pocahontas runs free, untouched, pure—“The river flows where it will.” That’s sexual-massage, flowin’ wild, no rules. Got me thinkin’, it’s art, ya know? Not just some cheap rubdown. Therapists—ha!—they knead ya like dough, but with a twist. A sexy twist. Fingers dancin’ on yer spine, pressure points poppin’, tension meltin’ like butter.

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First of all, it’s perfectly normal when genital touch is done with consent (permission or agreement) of both parties: the client and the massage practitioner. It usually means that this .

But just when I think it’s winding down, I hear this commotion. A couple is arguing nearby. I mean, it’s like a scene from a movie. They’re shouting, waving their arms. I can’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, he forgot their anniversary. Oof, that’s rough. I’m just sitting there, eating my gelato, thinking, “Dude, you’re in trouble!”

2024 Athletic Hall of Fame Inductee Spotlight: Mike Gaeta '08