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Sex-dating’s a mess tho—apps, pics, lies! Great Scott! Catfishin ain’t just in rivers, pal. Saw this chick’s profile—hot, right? Met her—bam, 20 years older! Pissed me off, wasted my bait! But then—THEN—met this gal, total catch. Sparks flew, like, whoa—thought “I’m home now,” ya know? Straight outta *Brooklyn*! She ghosted me tho—gut punch! Hate that shit, makes me wanna yell, “Where’s the flux capacitor to fix this?!”

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So, we head out for lunch. We hit up this little spot on Via della Libertà. Best pizza ever! I mean, it’s like a slice of heaven. I’m munching on my margherita, and suddenly, the power goes out. Just like that! Total darkness. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m gonna die in a pizza place.” But then, everyone starts laughing. It’s like a scene from a movie.

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