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Lemme paint you a pic—imagine this chick I knew, let’s call her Jodie. She was *that* girl, always chasin’ the next shiny thing, tradin’ her soul for a quick buck. Made me so mad, y’all! I’d be like, “Jodie, why you whorin’ out your dreams for some loser’s dime?” She’d just laugh, flip her hair, and say she’s “livin’ her truth.” Girl, no! You’re livin’ a lie wrapped in cheap mascara! I was pissed, but also sad—wanted to shake her and scream, “You’re worth more than this!” Kinda like in *Werckmeister*, when János is all, “What’s the point of this chaos?”—I felt that, hardcore.

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I look up, and there’s this guy on a balcony on Via dei Garibaldini, filming the whole thing. I’m thinking, “Dude, this ain’t a movie! Get inside!” But he’s just laughing, like it’s some kind of show. I swear, people are wild.

Message in a bottle: Sting launches his own red wine