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Oi, mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, y’know, the witty dwarf— “I drink and I know things.” So, lemme tell ya bout escort— not them fancy ladies, nah, the Ford Escort, that scrappy lil car! Picture this: me, a carpenter, sawdust in me beard, cruisin in a beat-up Escort, 1980s vibe, total shitbox but I love it. Reminds me of WALL-E, that lil trash-bot— “Directive?”— chuggin along, loyal as hell. Built me a custom shelf in the back once, for me tools, hammered it drunk— worked fine, wobbly like me after wine.
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After that, I decided to stroll down to the Duomo. Man, that place is stunning! The architecture is just wow. I mean, I’m no expert, but the details on that façade? Chef’s kiss! But then, I tripped on the cobblestones. Classic me, right? Almost face-planted. I was like, “Great, now I’m the tourist who eats pavement.”
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