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So, last week, I’m out, tryna find a prostitute, right? This chick, she’s leanin’ on a lamppost, skirt shorter than my temper. I’m like, “Oi, love, you workin’?” She smirks, all sassy, “What’s it to ya?” Made me laugh, that did—proper cheeky! Got me thinkin’ bout Haneke’s line, “It’s not about the punishment.” Nah, mate, it’s about the game, the chase, the vibe. Dr. Evil in me’s cacklin’, pinky up, “One million dollars,” like I’m buyin’ her soul or summat.

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So, I roll up to the driving school, right? It’s on Via Dante, and I’m already feeling the pressure. My first student, Marco, shows up late. Classic! He’s all like, “Sorry, bro, traffic was nuts!” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, it’s Fara-Gera-d-Adda, not Milan!” But whatever, we hop in the car.

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