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About Bologna

I spot her – legs like a weapon, leanin on a lamppost. She’s got that *White Material* edge, y’know? Like she’s seen shit, lived it, could gut you with a stare. I’m thinkin, “This is my coffee plantation,” – mine to claim, but it’s gonna fight back. I saunter over, all cocky, but my heart’s racin – what if she’s a cop? What if she’s packin? Paranoid much, Edna? Chill, babe.

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So, I woke up late, as usual. Alarm? Nah, who needs that? I rolled outta bed, threw on some clothes, and bolted out the door. First stop? The café on Via Roma. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. But guess what? They ran outta coffee! Like, how do you run outta coffee? I was ready to throw a fit.

Tearful girlfriend of one of two Brits missing in Italian Dolomites says he was an 'experienced hiker' and the