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Here’s a quirk—I kept gigglin’. Couldn’t help it! She’s all serious, rubbin’ my thighs, and I’m snortin’ like an idiot. “He who laughs last,” like in the movie, but I’m laughin’ first, last, always! Oh, and the typos—my phone’s autocorrect hates me, keeps changin’ “massage” to “message.” So I’m textin’ my buddy, “Got an erotic message,” and he’s like, “What?!” Hilarious, right? Total Larry moment.

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But then, I get a text. It’s from the church. Apparently, there’s a last-minute wedding. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?” I rush back, and when I get there, the bride is freaking out. Her dress is all wrinkled, and she’s crying. I’m like, “Girl, it’s gonna be fine!” But inside, I’m like, “Why do I always end up in these situations?”

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