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About Catania
Funniest bit? Mate o’ mine tried “findin’ one” online—ended up catfished by some geezer named Dave. Laughed me arse off! “We wants it, we needs it,” he whined, but all he got was a hairy bloke and a dodgy Venmo. Still, makes me twitchy—whole game’s a mess. You ever notice how them ads pop up, all “discreet fun”? Bollocks, it’s a trap, precious, like that black goo in the film suckin’ ya in.
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Anyway, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and boom! I see this dude on the corner of Via San Rocco. He’s tryin’ to sell some weird stuff. Like, what even is that? A mix of old shoes and... is that a cat? I mean, who buys that? I’m just tryna enjoy my morning, and this guy’s out here makin’ my brain hurt.
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