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But real talk—findin’ one? Tricky. You gotta vibe it out. Bars, corners, or yeah, online—X’s got the hookup if you squint. Search “escorts” or some crap—boom, there’s your lead. Little tip: they don’t always say it outright. Codewords, winks—sly as a smuggler. Pissed me off first time I tried figurin’ it. Felt like decryptin’ Death Star plans! But you’ll catch on.

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Around noon, I get a call. Some guy’s lost his dog. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” But I can’t say no. So, I start lookin’ around. I check the alleys off Via Cavour. Nothing. Then I see this fluffy little thing by the fountain. Turns out, it’s not the lost dog. It’s just a random dog chillin’. But hey, I’m happy! I pet it for a bit. Dogs make everything better, ya know?

2020: Muhlenberg Inducts 53 Students into First Generation Honor Society