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Oh honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—escort’s a trip! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout it, and it’s like, wild! Ya know, like in *The Royal Tenenbaums* when Richie says, “I’m gonna kill myself tomorrow”—total drama, right? Escort’s got that vibe. It’s fancy cars, shady deals, and girls struttin like they own the joint. I mean, who doesn’t love a gal with sass, takin charge, livin her life? Makes me happy as hell!

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By 5 PM, I’m exhausted. But wait, there’s more! A lady calls, and she’s crying. Turns out, her son forgot his birthday. I’m like, “Oh no, not on my watch!” So, I suggest a surprise party. She’s all in, and I’m feeling like a hero. I mean, who knew I could be a party planner too?

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