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Oh, and the oils—gods, the smells! Lavender, ylang-ylang—sounds like a spell, don’t it? Little secret: medieval monks used to sneak rose oil for “holy massages”—wink, wink. Bet they giggled like kids. Surprised me when I dug that up—holy hands gettin’ naughty? Love it!

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Then, boom! The phone rings again. This time, it’s a lady from Via Garibaldi. She’s freaking out because her neighbor’s music is too loud. I’m like, “Lady, it’s 9 AM! What do you expect?” But she’s all, “It’s like a disco in here!” I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who throws a party at 9 AM? Only in Cosio, right?

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