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But, man, it ain’t always funny. Sometimes escorts screw up—piss me off! Like, this one time, escort lost a rookie QB in a hotel. Kid wandered off, ended up in a bar, drunk off his ass. Coach was screamin’, “Where’s my damn player?!” I’m like, “Eat my shorts, dude, pay better escorts!” “Theirs is a dominion,” like the movie says—total control freaks, but they flopped. Had to counsel that QB for weeks after—nightmare!

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After that, I need a break. I head out to Via XXV Aprile, where there’s this park. It’s a nice spot, you know? Kids are playing, old folks are feeding pigeons. I sit on a bench, just trying to catch my breath. I see this old man with a huge mustache, and he’s talking to a pigeon like it’s his best friend. I’m cracking up.

A Sesto i funerali di Anna, la 21enne morta dopo aver mangiato un tiramisù vegano – FOTO