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About Naples

I tried it once—fuckin’ disaster. Bird I met kept callin’ me “daddy”—eww, no thanks, love! Felt like I was in a dodgy porno, not a date. Happy though—dodged a bullet there. Could’ve been stuck with a clingy nutter. “We’re executioners, not lovers!”—that’s me, ditchin’ her arse fast.

Threesome Perugia

I finally get to the fields, and my sheep are just chillin’. But then, I see one of ‘em, Baa-bara (yeah, I named her), she’s stuck in a bush. I’m like, “Seriously, Baa-bara? You had one job!” I pull her out, and she looks at me like, “What’s the big deal?” I swear, these sheep have no sense of danger.