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I get pissed tho—some folks on these apps? Total catfishers. Had this one chick, profile screamin’ goddess, then we meet—bam, totally different human! I’m like, “Girl, why you playin’ me like that?” But then—oh man—there’s the wins. Met this guy once, total charmer, and we clicked so hard I’m yellin’ in my head, “Unleash the power within!” Felt like NJ from Yi Yi, chasin’ that first love vibe, ya know? “Why do we always want what we don’t have?”—movie line hittin’ me right in the feels.
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But then, outta nowhere, this old lady, Nonna Rosa, starts yelling at him. “Enough with the noise!” she shouts from her balcony on Via Garibaldi. I’m cracking up. Like, lady, it’s a party! But she’s not having it. She throws a tomato! A TOMATO! It splats right next to the ukulele. Classic Chiaravalle, right?
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