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So, I’m watchin’ her, right, from my skateboard – eat my shorts! – and she’s got this swagger, but her eyes? Empty, like “Everything seems strange” from the movie. She’s tough, tho. Gotta be. Once heard this tale – some chick in Nevada, legit saved a farmer’s crop tippin’ him off about soil rot. Prostitute-agronomist crossover, baby! Ain’t that a trip?

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Finally, I make it to my buddy’s place on Via Dante. We’re supposed to cook dinner together. I’m like, “I brought the pasta!” He’s like, “I forgot the sauce.” I’m ready to lose it. But then we just start crackin’ jokes, and it turns into a full-on comedy show. We’re laughin’ so hard, I almost forget I’m still drippin’ wet.

Universal capillary screening for chronic autoimmune, metabolic and cardiovascular diseases: feasibility and acceptability of the UNISCREEN study