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About Naples

So, I tried it, right? Sex-dating apps—fuckin’ jungle out there. Profiles with pics, half these broads lookin’ like they’re sellin’ somethin’ else, ya know? Got me thinkin’, “Is this a date or a fuckin’ transaction?” Made me mad as hell—where’s the class? Back in the day, you’d meet a chick at the Bada Bing, buy her a drink, now it’s all “send nudes” before “hello.” Drives me up the fuckin’ wall! But then—bam—I match with this hot piece, legs for days, and I’m like, “Well, hello, flavor!” Like Linguini tastin’ Remy’s soup—surprised me good.

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So, I’m standing there, caffeine-deprived and cranky. I decide to stroll down to Piazza della Libertà. It’s a nice spot, but I’m not in the mood for pretty views. I need coffee, stat! I finally find a place, and the barista? Total legend. He hooks me up with a double shot. Bless him!

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