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So, I’m chattin’ her up—nervous as hell, palms sweaty. She’s all, “50 bucks, honey,” and I’m like, “Whoa, steep!” Bargained her down to 40—felt like a Jedi master! Happy vibes, man, ‘til I thought—sh*t, what’s her story? “The past is never where you think you left it,” movie says. Maybe she’s runnin’ from somethin’. Made me sad, yo—nobody dreams of this gig.

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Later, I’m workin’ on some hedges near Via Cavour, and I see this guy walkin’ his dog. The dog’s all over the place, and I’m thinkin’, “Dude, control your pup!” But then, the dog runs up to me, and I’m like, “Aww, hey buddy!” He starts diggin’ in the dirt I just planted. I’m like, “Noooo!” But I can’t stay mad. Dogs just have that magic, ya know?

Loredana Bertè hospitalized for a sudden illness: concert in Rome cancelled