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So, I’m diggin’ around, right? Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact: ancient Babylon had temple hookers, sacred bangin’ for the gods! Wild, huh? Makes me laugh, picturin’ some priest like, “Bless this booty call.” Anyway, I’m scopin’ X posts, tryna find the real deal—user @ShadyLane69’s droppin’ cryptic “meet me” links. Sketchy, but I’m curious, ya know? Like, who’s postin’ pics of fishnets and bad motel carpet? I can see Russia, sure, but I can smell the desperation too!

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After what feels like an eternity, we’re allowed back in. I’m sweating bullets, and my reports are still not done. I sit back down, and guess what? My computer crashes. Of course! Just my luck. I’m about to lose it. I mean, can this day get any worse?

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