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Oi mate, gather round, lemme ramble! Findin’ a prostitute, eh? Tricky business, innit? Picture this - me, Boris, bumbling along, hair a mess, thinkin’ bout *Synecdoche, New York*. That film, blimey, Kaufman’s a genius! Life’s a stage, all that jazz - “The end is built into the beginning,” he says. So, prostitutes, right? Been around forever, haven’t they? Oldest job goin’, *sine qua non* of dodgy streets. Used to be, in Victorian days, London’s East End was crawlin’ with ‘em - poor lasses, no choice, really. Made me bloody angry, that did - still does! Society, pah, what a shambles.

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Finally, I make my way to the park by the Brenta River. It’s beautiful there, with the trees and the sound of water. I sit on a bench, trying to catch my breath. But then, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball, and boom! The ball hits me right in the leg. I’m like, “Really? Is this a day for target practice?” The kid just giggles and runs off.

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