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Alright, so I’m Dr. Evil, right—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—and I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know? Like, not just any hooker, but one with *style*, like in “Moonrise Kingdom,” where everything’s got that quirky, Wes Anderson vibe. Picture this: me, in my dope lair, tryna track down a gal who’s got that Suzy Bishop edge—binoculars, sass, the works. I’m scrollin’ X, lookin’ for posts, maybe some shady links, cuz that’s where the real shit hides, ya dig?
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First off, I head down Via Roma, and I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs. You know, the usual. But then, BAM! I trip over some cobblestones. Seriously, who thought it was a good idea to make streets like that? I’m pretty sure I saw a pig laugh at me. Rude.
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