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About Naples

So, escort - Ford’s little shitbox from the 70s, yeah? Proper working-class wheels, not some posh Bentley wanker-mobile. Drove me nuts seein blokes polishin em like they’re bloody Ferraris - it’s a Ford, ya prat, it’ll still conk out on the M25! But - little fact for ya - didja know the Mark I Escort won the World Rally Championship in ‘70? Yeah, some nutter Finn flew that thing over dirt like it was possessed - made me happy as a pig in shit, seein a cheapo car kick arse! Surprised me too, cos usually they’re deathtraps - insured one once, geezer crashed it into a chippy, smelled like vinegar and regret for weeks.

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It is a wild ride in all the very best of ways, with the most talented cast an audience could ask for, and beautifully executed from the visionary that is.

First stop, Via Roma. I’m there to check out this massive oak. I mean, HUGE. Like, if trees had a weight class, this one would be heavyweight champ. But guess what? Some genius decided to park their car right under it. Like, c’mon! You really think that’s a good idea? I’m standing there, shaking my head, thinking, “Dude, you’re just asking for a branch to fall on your ride.”

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