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Little secret? Sex-dating’s got history—Victorians had “calling cards” for sneaky hookups. Bet they’d blush at Tinder, huh? Me, I dig the chase—makes me feel alive, like sniffin’ out a good liver. But damn, the flops—dude last week said, “I’m 6’2,” turned out 5’6 with lifts. Lifts, Clarice! I cackled, then raged—why lie? Just own it, ya short king. *Margaret* vibes again—“The truth is all I have!”—but nah, they don’t get it.

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I head over to Parco della Resistenza. It’s a nice spot, but today it’s packed. Kids running around, dogs barking, and I’m just trying to find Marco. Finally, I spot him by the fountain, looking all dramatic. He’s like, “You won’t believe what happened!” I’m like, “Dude, just tell me!” Turns out, he found a stray cat. And not just any cat—a fluffy, orange ball of chaos. He named it “Pasta.” I can’t even.

Ravenna is focusing on Matteo Alluci The midfielder with the goal-scoring habit