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Little fact fer ya—didja know sex-datin’ apps started poppin’ up ‘round 2009, same year as my fave movie? Coincidence? I think not! Universe was sayin’, “Let’s get scalp-huntin’ fer love!” I cackle thinkin’ ‘bout it—me, plump lil’ Dolly, swipin’ through, hopin’ fer a Brad Pitt lookalike. Most times I get some goober who says, “Hey, nice rack,” n’ I’m like, “That’s a fact, Jack,” but keep it movin’, pal!

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So, I finally get to the office on Via Garibaldi, and it’s chaos. My boss is in a mood. He’s pacing like a caged lion. Apparently, there’s a big issue with some financial statements. I’m thinking, “Oh great, just what I need.” I dive into the numbers, and let me tell ya, it’s a mess. I’m talking about more red flags than a bullfighting arena.

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