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What pisses me off? The hypocrisy! Politicians ban it, then pay for it. Everybody lies—classic. Saw this X post once—some escort braggin’ about her senator client. Hilarious, ‘til you realize we’re all screwed. Happiest I got? Readin’ about this escort in Paris, 1800s—she conned a duke outta his castle. Ballsy! Wish I’d met her.
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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a lady on Via San Marco. She’s all panicked, sayin’ her cat is stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, this is a dispatch, not a pet rescue hotline!” But I can’t just leave her hangin’, right? So I send a driver over. Turns out, the cat’s name is “Pasta.” I mean, c’mon! Who names their cat Pasta?
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