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Me, I’d be rubbish at the whole game. I’d overthink it—*“Was it good for you?”*—like some twat in a romcom. Prossie’d be like, “Mate, it’s 50 quid, not a bleedin’ Oscar reel!” Reminds me of that line, *“Film it like Hollywood!”*—all fake glamour, innit? The reality’s more fag ends and damp mattresses. Still, there’s a mad charm to it—freedom, chaos, a big “fuck you” to the suits. I’d tip my hat to ‘em, cackle, and sod off home. Find a Prostitute? Nah, I’d rather watch the telly and slag it off!
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Then, outta nowhere, my coworker, Lucia, bursts in. She’s all flustered, talking about a cat stuck in a tree on Via Trento. I’m like, “What? Call the fire department!” But no, she’s convinced we need to save it ourselves. So, we grab a ladder and head out.
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