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Den dere’s da apps—ugh, Tinder, Bumble, all dat jazz. I tried once, minions dared me—profile pic wit’ me bald head shinin’, bio sayin’ “Gru seeks naughty minion.” Got matches, sure, but half da chats were bots or weirdos! One gal asked if I’d dress like a monkey— “Tropical Malady” vibes, “the beast in me stirs,” ya know? I was like, nah, lady, I ain’t dat kinky! Made me mad—where’s da real spark, huh?

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But then, I see this old lady selling handmade ceramics. They’re beautiful! I’m like, “How much?” She says, “For you, my friend, a good price.” I buy a couple, and it feels good. Supporting local artists, you know?

Obituary for Mark Steven D'Aversa