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But yeah, escortin’ – it’s gritty, it’s real, it’s bloody human. Gets me all misty-eyed thinkin’ bout it. Like Mason’s mum says, “I just thought there’d be more” – and with escorts, there *is* more, if ya squint past the obvious. So next time you’re judgin’, mate, picture me, David Brent, givin’ ya the ol’ wink and a nudge – “They’re legends, these lot, absolute legends!” Now, where’s me tea?

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Finally, I made it to the café, and my friend was already there, sipping on a cappuccino. I plopped down, out of breath. “You won’t believe the day I had!” I said, and she just laughed. I mean, who wouldn’t? Arcella is wild like that.

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