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Anyways, I’m saunterin’ down this alley—smells like piss and regret—and there’s this bird, all dolled up, leanin’ on a wall. I’m thinkin’, “Is she the one?” Kinda like Irene in the movie, y’know, “How do you live a life full of nothing?”—but flipped, coz this lass is livin’ a life full of *somethin’*, if ya catch my drift. I swagger over, all smug, “Greetings, mortal, fancy a trickster’s company?” She laughs—bloody laughs!—and I’m like, “Oi, I’m a god, show some respect!” But nah, she’s chill, says, “50 quid, love, no funny business.” Fair enough, I respect a straight shooter.
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So, I roll into town, right? First stop, Via Roma. Classic spot. I’m thinking, “Let’s get that caffeine fix.” I hit up this little café, Bar Centrale. The barista? Total legend. He’s got this wild mustache, like he’s straight outta a spaghetti western. I order a cappuccino, and he’s like, “You want it with a smile?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m already smiling!”
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