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About Naples

Apps these days – sex on tap! Grindr, Bumble, Hinge – pick yer poison. Little known fact: Romans did it too! Orgies, mate, *bacchanalia* – proper shag-fests! Tinder’s just modern toga parties, yeah? *Carpe diem*, seize the day, or night! This one time, geezer sends me a dodgy pic – cock out, no warnin! Laughed me arse off, then blocked him. "Memory’s a wonderful thing," says Celine in the movie – wish I could unsee that!

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But then, the day took a turn. We’re walking down Via G. Marconi, and I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s kinda catchy. I’m tapping my foot, feeling the vibe, when suddenly, this guy trips over his own feet and knocks over the accordion! I’m dying laughing, but then I feel bad. Like, dude, that’s his livelihood!

Suspect arrested in October shooting outside 7-Eleven that injured 3