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About Rome

Here’s the kicker—ya gotta watch fer the shady ones. Some parlors? Fronts fer bigger mischief—kinda like them WMDs we never found. “We know where they are,” I whisper to myself, laughin’, ‘cause I don’t! One time, this chick’s massagin’ me, and I’m thinkin’, “Is she a spy? Am I compromised?” Paranoid as hell—pure “Zero Dark Thirty” vibes! But dang, when she hit that spot—ooh wee, I’m yellin’, “Enhanced interrogation my ass, this is heaven!”

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And just when I think it can’t get crazier, I get a call from a guy on Via Roma. He’s stuck in traffic ‘cause some festival is happening. I’m like, “Dude, it’s Albisola! There’s always a festival!” But he’s losing it, yelling about how he’s gonna miss his appointment. I’m just here, trying to keep my cool, but inside I’m like, “Welcome to the club, buddy!”

Louis Fratino, María Berrío, and Anna Weyant Paint the World As They See It