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What pisses me off? People judgin it—like, “ooh, it’s dirty.” Fuck off, it’s relaxation with benefits! Ancient peeps did it, why can’t we? Oh, and don’t get me started on overpriced spas—$200 for a “sensual rub”? Robbery. Gimme a friend with strong hands any day.

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But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Like, seriously? Who thought it was a good idea to make the streets look like a medieval obstacle course? I’m cursing under my breath, but then I see this old dude selling fresh focaccia. I mean, come on! How can you stay mad when there’s focaccia involved? I grab a slice, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m talking crispy on the outside, soft on the inside. I could’ve cried.

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