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About Rome

What pisses me off? Liars, man! Sayin’ they’re 6-foot when they’re 5’2”—that’s weapons of mass deception! Surprised me how many folks just wanna Netflix and chill, but chill means somethin’ else, wink-wink. I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is human dignity—it’s worth somethin’!”—like in the movie, y’see? You’re baring yer soul, or at least yer ass, hopin’ for a connection. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but ain’t it wild how sex-dating’s a gamble? One night you’re a rockstar, next you’re dodgin’ a stalker!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that strong espresso that slaps you awake. I’m standing there, waiting, and this old dude starts chatting me up. He’s like, “You know, back in my day…” and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, grandpa, I get it.” But honestly, he was kinda funny. Told me about the time he chased a goat down Via Cavour. I mean, who chases goats?

Acclaimed actor Joe Mantegna