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Start online, obvi. Sites like Backpage are gone, RIP, but there’s sketchy forums now. X posts too—guys drool, “she’s hot,” I roll my eyes. No capes, no fakes! Some ads? Pure scams. Once saw a “$50 special”—girl showed up, 60, missing teeth. “You’re not drinking enough!” I screamed in my head, quoting Gyllenhaal’s meltdown. Lesson: check reviews, darlings. Sites like TER—pricey membership, but juicy deets. Pro tip: dudes lie, so dig deep.
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So, I’m like, “Get it together, dude.” I shake it off and keep walking. The air is crisp, and the mountains are all around. I mean, have you seen the views? It’s like nature’s own Instagram filter. But then, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bus. A BUS! It’s the only bus in town, and it’s late. Like, really late. I’m thinking, “C’mon, Egilsstadir, get your act together!”
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