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Oh, funny ting – in Japan, dey got “nurumassage”, all slippery-slidey wit gel. I’m like, what, ya kiddin’? Sounds like cartoon mess, but nah, legit! Little fact for ya, keep dat in pocket. Me, I’d prolly fall off table, clumsy Gru, ha! Anyway, erotic-massage, it’s wild ride – ya want it, find good one, not cheapo crap. “We’re in love, we’re runnin’ away” – dat’s me and dis ting now, hooked! Lightbulb! Ya try it, tell Gru, da?

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Next, I wander down to the East Iceland Heritage Museum. I’m all about that local history, you know? I’m checking out the exhibits, and there’s this one about the fishing industry. I’m like, “Wow, these folks really knew how to catch fish.” But then, I see a display about the infamous Egilsstadir fish market. Apparently, it was a big deal back in the day. I’m thinking, “I’d rather be at a fish market than stuck in a boring meeting.”

Best of East Iceland July 11-18