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So, check it—little known fact, yeah? Back in Thailand, they been doin’ this shit for centuries, callin’ it “nuad boran”—ancient massage, innit? Not just a quick rub-and-tug, nah, it’s proper spiritual! Blows me mind, it does. Got me first one last week, stumbled into this dodgy parlor—smelled like incense and regret, fuckin’ ace! Bloke’s hands on me back, kneading like I’m dough, and I’m thinkin’, “Sharon’d kill me!” *mumbled incoherence* “Sharon!” But I’m lovin’ it, mate—tension’s gone, knob’s happy, what’s not to like?

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So, I grab some takeout from this little place on Kaupvangsstræti. Best fish and chips ever! I’m scarfing it down, and I swear, I can hear the ocean calling me. I’m thinking, “Why do I live in a place this beautiful and not spend more time outside?”

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