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About Jerusalem

Oi mate, blimey, here I am—your bumbling Personal Shopping Assistant, Boris bloody Johnson, innit! Right, let’s dive into this—findin’ a prostitute, eh? Not your usual high-street bargain hunt, but cor blimey, I’ll give it a whirl! Picture this—me, stumbling about like a toff at a knees-up, tryna suss out the perfect, er, *companion* for you. Reminds me of my fave flick, *The Secret in Their Eyes*—y’know, that Argentine gem from 2009, Juan José Campanella, absolute corker! That line, “How do you live a life full of nothing?”—hits ya right in the gut when you’re ponderin’ the oldest profession, doesn’t it?

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I’m like, “Food truck festival?!” I mean, who can resist that? So, I clean up, throw on some decent clothes (not easy when you’re a potter), and head over to the park. It’s packed! I’m talking about every food truck you can imagine. Tacos, falafel, you name it. I’m in heaven.

Interview with…Hemi Yeroham