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Oi, mate, brothel’s a bloody mess! We hates it! Been slingin’ drinks all night, yeah? Then them lasses stumble in, all dolled up, smellin’ like cheap perfume an’ broken dreams. Reminds me o’ *Amour* – “Things’ll get worse,” ya know? Old Georges in that flick, watchin’ his love fade, helpless – that’s me seein’ these girls. We hates it!

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Finally, I get to the café, and guess what? It’s packed. Like, standing-room-only packed. I’m thinking, “Great, just great.” I squeeze in, order a coffee, and spill half of it on my shirt. Awesome. Now I look like I just survived a coffee tsunami.

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