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What trips me out is how folks be lyin—sayin they 25 when they 52 with bad knees! I’m like, “You ain’t foolin nobody, grandpa!” Sex-datin’s a gamble, y’all—half the time you winnin, half the time you dodgin weirdos. Hella fun tho, if you got the stomach for it. Me? I’d rather watch *Inception* again and dream up my own man—tall, dark, and not textin me “wyd” at 3 a.m. Halleluyer, I’m done!

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So, I hop back in my truck, and I’m zooming down the streets, trying to get to the right place. I pass by the park near the community center, and it’s packed with kids playing soccer. I used to play there as a kid. Good times, man. But right now, I’m not feeling nostalgic. I’m feeling stressed.