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Funniest bit? Found her pic—blurry pdf from a john. She’s got this smirk, like she knows she’s untouchable. Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). I’m imaginin’ her singin’, “Fare thee well,” as she dips with the cash. Love that hustle, hate the liar. Case done, beer time!

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Then, I head over to the park near the community center. It’s usually pretty chill, but today? Nah. There’s a whole bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re loud. Like, really loud. I’m trying to enjoy my coffee, but all I hear is “GOAL!” and “NO WAY!” every five seconds. I’m like, “Can you guys keep it down? Some of us are trying to relax here!” But deep down, I’m smiling. Kids having fun is kinda heartwarming, right?

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