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So, legit, I’m scoping out these girls, and it’s, like, sketchy AF. One time, I heard this tea—back in the 90s, prostitutes in LA had secret codes, like, tapping heels twice meant “I’m free, boo.” How cool is that? Totally random, but I’m obsessed. I’m, like, texting my BFF, “Girl, this is insane,” and she’s all, “Kim, wyd?” I’m dying laughing, ‘cause, like, who even does this?

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But then, outta nowhere, I see this cat. Not just any cat, but a fluffy, fat one. It’s just chillin’ in the middle of the street like it owns the place. I’m like, “Dude, move!” But nah, it just stares at me. I swear, it was judging my life choices. I laughed, but also got mad. Like, c’mon, I got places to be!

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