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So, sex-dating – it’s nuts! Apps like Tinder, Grindr – boom, instant hookups. Little fact: 80% of users just want quick bangs. No “let’s meditate by the lake” vibes here! Met this chick once – total catfish. Pics all glam, real life? Ruh-roh, Scoob! Felt pissed, like – why lie, dude? Movie’s got that line, “Lust awakens the soul.” Sure, but also awakens my Scooby-sense for fakes!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Main Ave. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I grab my usual—black coffee, no sugar. I need that jolt, ya know? But the barista, bless her heart, spills half of it on me. I’m like, “Really? I just got here!” I’m soaked, smellin’ like burnt beans. Great start, right?